doublecrowss | Inbox for awash

Right. Whenever I first form a bond with someone, the voice tells me what Arcana they are to me. And it told me you are Justice.

[He smiles.] Makes sense, right? You were trying to end my reign of terror, after all.

[All meant in jest, of course! Even if Akechi still means for him to quit being a Phantom Thief after this is all over... (He can't help but wonder if that is really the case.)]

I'm able to... create new Personas, using the ones I've taken on. And if the resulting Persona is of a certain Arcana that I have a strong bond with, they gain a big power boost. It allows me to make even stronger Personas than I had before.

Edited 2019-01-23 04:39 (UTC)

[ ... ah. So his hunch was right, after all. ]

... I see. So you draw strength from bonds in a quite literal sense. It's no wonder both you and Arisato-kun seem to hold them in such high regard.

[ That same grossly romanticized view of interpersonal relationships, and notions that have always eluded him like teamwork, and friendship, and camaraderie... It makes sense for them to find them so precious. It's what gives them power, after all.

It's also no wonder Akechi could never find out about that on his own. He never had any strong connections to anyone. ]

How do you do it? Create new Personas, I mean?

[ He wonders if the process is just as gruesome as it is to him. ]

Well, it's also just nice to have friends.

[He doesn't want Akechi to think the power is the only reason he treasures these bonds, after all. There're so much more important than their use in fighting shadows. They're what give him a reason to wake up in the morning; a reason to live.]

But... ah. [He laughs a little.] It's a little weird, but... Basically, I have to execute them. And it's like their essences fuse together to make a new Persona.

[He wonders if Akechi can do the same.]

[ Akechi doesn't pay much attention to the !nice to have friends" comment, partially because he still has a hard time believing it, but mostly because he's more interested in the rest of Akira's explanation. ]

Fusion, huh...

[ So it is the same as him, after all. That much isn't too surprising, though there's a lot more he wants to ask-- if that long-nosed man is also in the room being maddeningly unhelpful, and whether he can perform those fusions by himself or has to employ the help of a pair of twins...

But, he can't ask that, not without revealing more than he should. So he settles for something else: ]

So you execute and fusion them together into a new Persona-- stronger, but retaining some of their original features, I imagine? It doesn't sound very different from what humans do in life; as they grow and meet new people, they borrow new personality traits from each other, while leaving others behind...

[ Or at least, that's how he consciously knows it works for most people, if not not so much for himself. It makes him wonder if this, too, is why he never saw much of a point in fusing Personas-- why the results were always so weak. ]

[He's never really thought of it quite like that before, but what Akechi says strikes a chord. Taking on new pieces of personality, and leaving others behind... that is what he does, isn't it? In a way, at least.

Maybe that's why he still doesn't wholly feel like he knows himself. Because he isn't finished trying on new parts.]

I guess it is something like that. We learn and grow from our bonds, and so my Personas learn and grow in turn...

[They are all part of the sea of human consciousness, after all.]

I just wish it wasn't so... grisly.

[ Of course he never thought of it like that-- did he even think of it at all? From where Akechi is standing, sometimes it just seems like he just accepted his powers without much questioning whatsoever, just using them for his phantom thievery and his senseless talk of friends and teammates.

Then again, perhaps Akechi has an edge over him in that respect, and a whole extra two years to do enough questioning of his own. ]

From my understanding, everything in the Metaverse seems like an overly grotesque version of people's thoughts and feelings. Shadow selves, Personas, even the collective subconscious that is Mementos... In a way, I'm not surprised you essentially have to play Frankenstein with parts of your soul.

[ At the very least, Akechi felt particularly appalled by this method. Killing parts of his personality to take on more palatable masks, to become someone people could grow to like more easily... He'd been doing that his whole life. ]

It does make me wonder, though. You once told me having multiple Personas makes you feel like you don't know who you really are... But, once you have figured it out, does that mean you'll lose that power...?

[ Does that mean Akechi, too, doesn't know who he really is...? ]

[It's not like Akira doesn't think of them, these powers that were forced on him. But different people have different perspectives - he's been trying to show Akechi that.

But for now he ponders the question. If he learns who he is, will he lose his Personas? Perhaps they'll be replaced with one single Persona, like his friends. Or maybe he'll simply have a small group of them, for each of his personality traits.

Or maybe he'll lose them for good.]

...Maybe.

[However, despite this uncertainty... he seems at ease.]

But by then, maybe I won't need them anymore.

[Maybe by then, he'll have other ways of fighting for what's right.]

... you make it sound so simple.

[ He does, and Akechi doesn't get it. The idea of having even a single Persona - a shadow that is controlled by the ego and given physical shape - is enough to make him wonder, restless, but this power, the power both he and Joker share, the ability to take over dozens of Personas, switch between them, fuse and discard them as easily as pieces of clothing... Are they really in control of these multiple facets of theirs? Or is the shadows that really have power over them...?

He really doesn't get it. ]

Knowing that there might be more versions of "you" than perhaps you'll ever be aware of, being able to see them in such a solid way... If it were me, I think I would feel...

[ Empty. Like nothing he believes to know about himself will ever be concrete-- will ever be real. A fraud, no matter what he does. ]

Regardless-- [ A shake of his head. As far as Akira is supposed to know, that is merely a hypothetical. ] That isn't the case with you. You really are amazing...

[ Like Akechi will never be. Can never be. ]

[If it were him...

Akira wishes he had finished that sentence, but he thinks he can guess at it anyway. Perhaps it makes Akechi feel confused, incomplete... unsure of himself, and his place in the world.

Akira can certainly relate to those kinds of feelings.]

I... don't know if I'm amazing. [He feels a little heat rise to his face - not the right atmosphere for that sort of reaction, but it happens unbidden when Akechi says nice things about him, even if he's a bit downtrodden when he does.] I just focus on my goals and do what I feel like I have to. Same as anyone.

[Same as Akechi, though he wishes those goals were different...]

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