doublecrowss | Inbox for awash

[It's true - there is certainly something about this place that operates like a fairytale. Normal logic isn't as applicable, and maybe that means it's safe to assume fantastical logic is.

So he understands Akechi's thinking, because he wants to believe it, too. That somehow, things will work out - that Akechi's fate will be changed, that he'll come to their side, that he'll be able to make a better life for himself. That maybe when this is all done, they can still be together.

Maybe their fairytale will come true. But they can't do that without trust - without faith.

So he sighs, gives a nod, then holds out his hand. But it's clear he's still hesitant.]

I understand. I just... don't want to hurt you.

Losing color doesn't hurt. At worst, you'll just make me prematurely go gray-- and not just with worry this time, haha...!

[ ... okay, so maybe it's not the best time to make one of his trademark lame jokes, but it's his own way to be reassuring. He does mean what he says, though; according to Guren and, more importantly, his own experience, having all color drained isn't physically painful in any way. It only hurts in the metaphorical sense, to realize such important feelings are gone.

And even though he has reasons to be happier now, there's still enough baggage in there to make the temporary trade-off worth it. Not that this is something he's about to share, of course. ]

However, I understand this is still a difficult choice to make. [ So he takes Akira's hand in his and, instead of sealing an unfinished deal, he just gives it a squeeze, gentle and hopefully comforting. ] As such, I won't be asking that you make any final decisions right now. You can take your time, and get back to me once you've made up your mind.

[Akira might not physically roll his eyes at the joke, but the motion is still palpable in his stare - honestly, Akechi, at a time like this? But in honesty, Akira doesn't mind a little joke for levity, given the situation at hand.

Still, he's appreciative when Akechi agrees to give him time to think about it. He'll have to mentally prepare for this, get used to the idea in his head before he makes any final moves.

So he puts his other hand around Akechi's, squeezing him back, before moving to settle down more in the blankets.]

Alright. I'll think about it.

[He'll try not to keep Akechi waiting too long.]

Thank you. I'll be waiting for your decision.

[ And, really, Akechi has left Akira waiting on answers for possibly even longer before, so as long as he gets back to him before the next batch of quests are posted, there will be no complaining on his part. ]

In the meantime, though-- [ Here, he smiles down at Akira, inviting, but maybe with just a hint of mischief. ] There's one other quest we can do, isn't there?

[ One that they'll miserably fail at, but that's not what's really important here. ]

[Akira will try not to keep him waiting long. It's just... a big decision. He needs some time.

But he'll get back to Akechi as soon as he feels he can. He hopes Akechi trusts him on that.

So for now, he smiles back, finally relaxing back down so he can wiggle a bit more under the blanket.]

I did come here to cuddle.

[ Akechi is almost tempted to ask if that's all Akira really came for, but he chooses to remain silent instead-- though perhaps his smile speaks for him instead. ]

Well. I won't keep you waiting, then.

[ And he, too, proceeds to settling in more comfortably, pressing himself closer to Akira-- because it's a quest requirement, because the lack of space makes it necessary, but, more important, because he wants to. Whether Akira is a strength, a weakness, or even both, it doesn't really matter right now; the feeling is light on his chest, something he knowingly chooses to indulge on. ]

Is this comfortable?

Yeah.

[It's a contented word - Akira has so few of them, but they carry meaning all on their own. He lays his head over on Akechi's shoulder to settle in better, feeling his warmth on the side of his face.]

How about you? Enjoying yourself?

With you? Always.

[ And the best part? He doesn't have to flirt for the sake of flirting; he actually means every word he says. ]

I'm afraid I can't offer much in the way of entertainment, though. You did give me such short notice...

[ There aren't even stars to look at it, this time. There's only him. ]

[He doesn't mind that. Looking at Akechi is his new favorite pastime.]

That's alright. We can just talk.

[Or they could even just lay here. Take a nap, maybe. He honestly doesn't care either way.]

[ Akechi can't help but chuckle at that suggestion. ]

Hearing you say that could almost fool me into thinking you're the talkative type.

[ And Akira is... just about the opposite of that, really. Still, it's all meant in good jest; however little he said, it was enough to make Akechi like him, and he hopes that nuzzling his terribly frizzy hair is enough to reinforce his point. ]

That's a shame, you know. I rather like the sound of your voice.

[He just likes to do the listening, that's all! But Akira doesn't mind at all the nuzzling in his hair, and welcomes it happily by tilting his head more into the nuzzles.]

You do, huh?

[It's a pretty ordinary voice, though, isn't it? Well, maybe Akechi is a little biased.]

Yours isn't bad either. So I like listening.

[ This is good practice for when Akechi gets his own pet, it would seem. It's always a good sign when cats lean into your touch, isn't it? ]

So you get to enjoy mine, yet don't reciprocate the favor? That's mightily selfish of you, do you realize?

[ It's a lighthearted jab, but it does have a hint of truth to it. He wouldn't complain if Akira did just that little bit more talking every now and then... ]

Selfish, huh...?

[He doesn't really think of it like that - isn't it selfish to talk about yourself too much, and not let others have the floor? But Akechi does often tell him he does that too much...]

Then how about we trade off evenly, this time?

[ At that suggestion, Akechi pulls away, just enough to give Akira a questioning look, curious. ]

I'm not sure you can talk much more than your usual-- and it would take quite a lot to catch up to me, haha...

[ Another jab, but just as playful as the last, and he resumes his ministrations by burying his face in Akira's frizzy mane again. ]

It's all right, though. As much as I would like for you to be a little more expressive sometimes, I feel like I can get a good grasp on your thoughts and expand on them with my own words. I believe we complement each other this way, wouldn't you agree?

[That's a bit rude! He can talk, he just chooses not to...!

But he isn't actually offended, and he gives a little laugh at that.]

Yeah, I do.

[And that's all Akechi gets. If he's such a master of expanding on Akira's words, he shouldn't need more, right?]

[ Piece of shit! Akechi can translate his few words well enough, but he's not a miracle worker-- give him something more to work with! ]

And that makes it sound like you weren't very serious about evenly trading off,to begin with.

[ But, he's not particularly offended or even upset, either-- although maybe he'll break from his ever polite and nice facade to do the unthinkable and, gasp, flick Akira's arm in playful reprimand. Wow! ]

[Wow, indeed! Akira gives an exaggerated huff, but he can't stop smiling.]

Fine, then. Why don't you ask me a question, if you want to know something about me?

[Then he can talk about that, and Akechi can hear the sound of his voice.]

A question, hmm? That's almost like giving me too much power...

[ A dangerous thought in any other occasion, really, but not right now, not when they've re-established a lighter mood, comfortable despite Akechi's alarming request from before. And he wants to keep it that way. ]

In that case, tell me about your life back in your hometown. What were your family and friends like?

[ Probably not that great, if they're the kind of parents who get rid of a problem child like he's a disposable asset, but he'd still like to hear some more information before passing judgement. ]

[Ah. That is certainly a question...]

...It was alright, I guess. Pretty normal. My parents... they're not strict, but they're distant. I can't remember the last time we talked about something that wasn't homework or my life plans.

[And maybe he never really satisfied them with either.]

They were embarrassed by me, after my arrest. Barely talked to me after my expulsion. When Shujin accepted me, and they knew they'd have to send me to Tokyo... for them, I think it was a relief.

[Maybe he should have started with the less gloomy angle...]

[ At the mention of "relief", Akechi finds himself unconsciously holding on to Akira a little tighter, protective, but mostly angry. ]

... they took a stranger's word for truth instead of their own child's. That's--

[ He's quick to cut himself off, though, at least this time, before the mask slipped any further, before it looks more personal than he intends it to come off as.

(It is, though, on so many levels. Personal, because Akechi can relate to being oppressed by rotten adults, because Akira is someone he actually cares about, and... because of the one particularly rotten adult who made life difficult for the both of them.) ]

Were they public figures of some sort around town? High profile careers with a reputation to care for, perhaps?

[He feels Akechi tighten his grip, and reaches up to rub at his hand, trying to be calming. He didn't mean to make Akechi this upset, although he supposes it was inevitable, with this topic.]

Mm... my dad's kind of high up in his company, but they aren't really public figures. But it's a small town. People talk.

[He's over it now, or at least as much as he can be. His parents made their decisions. Going forward, Akira's focus is making sure that no kid ends up in the same position, with parents who make the same choices.]

But... it's not so much that they didn't believe me. Just that they don't think I should have gotten involved in the first place.

[What was it Sojiro said? Leave adult matters to adults?

In Akira's opinion, that's bullshit. And that's how he ended up where he is.]

[ The rubbing does help a little, and Akechi looses his grip on him, though he doesn't let go completely, either. ]

While I can't say I disagree with them on that matter, I still think sending you off on your own to a stranger's home was too drastic of a measure...

[ And though this explanation sits better with him, it's still hard not to relate too closely, to the idea of being passed around the minute he became a burden, to become someone else's problem and nothing more. Parents, or even extended family... don't they realize children aren't things to be readily discarded? ]

... ah, I'm sorry. It isn't my place to question their decisions.

[ What does he know about having parents, anyway? ]

What about your friends, though? [ A quick change of topic, hoping to lessen the gravity of their talk, drive it back to a lighter path. ] Surely you must have left quite a few behind?

[Next to him, Akira has gone a little stiff. Though he heard Akechi's question about his friends, his mind is on something he said a little earlier.

He gives a shrug to the topic of friends. It's not that interesting, anyway.]

I guess. But why don't you disagree?

[He isn't surprised, actually, that the real Akechi would disagree; he'd probably rather see Akira rot in a hole than do something heroic. But he wasn't really expecting Akechi to agree with his parents about this outright, either. Maybe it's a small thing to Akechi, but to him...

Was your previous decision a mistake, then?

To him, this is a moment that defines him.]

You think I shouldn't have gotten involved?

[ Akechi does feel him stiffen under his touch, and it strikes him as odd, especially when he's trying so hard to shift the topic from anything that could make him upset, like the memories of his parents getting rid of him like a mere object.

... but then Akira barely answers his following question, and Akechi realizes his mistake. Ah. ]

... We've had this conversation before, haven't we? I admire your willingness to help even a stranger, but heroism alone without any planning or power to rely on is a reckless move. What would you have done if, instead of an influential man, you had crossed someone who wasn't afraid to resort to violence?

[ And that's not even taking into account that it was Shido, of all people, that he had to mess with, and he, somehow, was both, powerful and unscrupulous. It was fortunate that Akira was just a nobody teenager, or else his life might have been in danger.)

(Except then Akira became Joker, and an even bigger target for Shido's wrath. The kind that Akechi was left to deal with.) ]

It's not that I think your choice to help was wrong in itself. But I can't ignore it's reason to be concerned, as I imagine your parents must have been.

[ As Akechi, himself, has come to be, the more he's learned to care about Akira. ]

[Akira knows they've had conversations like this. But being more careful about running into a monster's nest, or wandering off in the woods, or facing a difficult challenge alone... those all feel different. The choice that was in front of him that night wasn't one of deciding whether or not to rush into danger. It was about deciding whether to keep his head down, and walk right past something happening, and pretend he never saw it.

He can't. He can't do something like that.]

...If it had been me. Would you have wanted anyone who came across me to look down, and pretend they didn't see?

[Because so many people would. So many people do. The parents that told their children to endure Kamoshida's abuse. The officials who ignored the suffering of young people at the hands of Kaneshiro. All of the people who now know Shido's abuses, and are still okay with him being Prime Minister.

Something about the thought grabs at the back of Akira's mind, like the solution to a riddle that he just can't quite get to. Apathy. The apathy of bystanders.

He creases his eyebrows, eyes getting far away.]

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